In The Powder Room

Feb 14

The Five: Valentine's Day Edition

Comments (8) by US Staff February 14, 2013 - 3:15 PM

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Ah, young love. Remember those days? Valentine gifts of rose petals, candles, sexy lingerie, and whipped cream in all the right places?

Nah. Neither do we. 

Or in the words of one of our favorite bloggers, Kristin of What She Said:

"My first words to my husband this morning were not, 'Happy Valentine's Day, my love!' but rather, 'S'cuse me,' after I farted. Welcome to Valentine's Day after seven years of marriage, folks."  

HOLLA!

Not to be unromantic, but there really is a special level of comfort and intimacy that develops over time in relationships that survive that initial "breaking in period," much like a favorite pair of slippers. The love is still there, it's just more practical...and smelly.  

And on that note, here are our Top Five signs you're SO over sexy Valentine's Day treats:  

1. You’d have more use for chocolate body paint on Pancake Day than Valentine’s Day.

2. When your man gives you flowers, you can’t help thinking “What’s he feeling guilty about?”

3. You hope that keeping your socks on with those new crotchless panties isn't a deal-breaker.

4. Massage oil just makes you feel like a well-basted turkey (and OMG think of the sheets!)

5. When your man whispers in your ear “What would you like me to do?” you have to fight the urge to yell “Clean the oven!”

by US Staff February 14, 2013 - 3:15 PM

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Comments (8)

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  Report Thu Feb 14, 2013 - 10:01 pm

  by  The Bearded Iris

  I would yell "Paint the house!" but he'd probably think it was a euphemism. (I can't imagine why.)

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• 1 reply, Last reply by Shirls2012 on Fri Feb 15, 2013 at 1:18 am
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  Report Fri Feb 15, 2013 - 1:18 am

  by  Shirls2012

  @The Bearded Iris: Well I guess "Clean the oven" could also be taken as a euphemism...

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  Report Thu Feb 14, 2013 - 10:08 pm

  by  Erika

  Hubby wrote me a love letter last night. He's great with words and I'm such a sap (also 38 weeks preggo with #4) so of course I cried while reading it. In May, we'll have been married 10 years, so we're definitely in the "comfortable" stage of love. I'm not nearly so good with words, so I'll probably see if I can find the best Hallmark card that I can for him. And, probably make him his favorite cheesecake for dessert tonight.

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  Report Thu Feb 14, 2013 - 9:54 pm

  by  SaidKristin

  The one thing crotchless panties have going for them is efficiency - one less item of clothing to remove. Also, I don't even like to get the dreaded wet spot on my sheets, much less chocolate body paint or massage oil. ::shudder:: And thanks for the shout-out on my oh-so-classy homage to Valentine's Day. ;)

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  Report Thu Feb 14, 2013 - 9:52 pm

  by  lhewitt

  #3 better not be a deal breaker.

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  Report Thu Feb 14, 2013 - 9:51 pm

  by  Kim Bongiorno

  It's February. OF COURSE the socks stay on.

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  Report Thu Feb 14, 2013 - 9:50 pm

  by  Kristen

  yes! Although I would yell "clean the bathroom!" The oven cleans itself.

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  Report Thu Feb 14, 2013 - 9:46 pm

  by  Bren

  haha I can totally relate. I got a 2 dozen colored roses, chocolate, stuffy bear, and stuff from my hubs. First time in 8 years! One can't help think... "What the hell did he do this time?" :) Like your list!

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