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Sex raided
The other night while drinking wine and eating homemade pizza with some friends, we came to the sad conclusion that violence seems more accepted than sex, at least here in the United States.
All you have to do is watch a few TV cartoons, animated films or teen horror movies to see my point. Heads are chopped off. Large objects squish tiny creatures. Bodies are even buried alive. Most of these films come with a PG -13 rating. Why some are even rated simply PG.
But if a movie has a sex scene (or an obscene word) the R rating is slapped on. Which only makes it more enticing. What mother hasn't dug into her tween's pocket and found a naked picture of the opposite sex, or perhaps one of the same sex?
The mystery of it makes it desirable. In fact, I believe that this "tabooness" surrounding sex is a contributing factor in the popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey, but that's a topic for another day.
Our discussion led me to my previous life when I worked in the porn business.
Before you get your imaginations running wild, I was a behind the scenes player. Even though I was younger and firmer, my boobs still looked liked flapjacks and my butt resembled more of a deflated volleyball than a ripe watermelon.
My on-screen presence would not have helped our balance sheet.
And neither did the FBI raid which occurred one fine spring day. But there they were. Dressed in their FBI best with plastic smiles and beady eyes.
I'm not quite sure what they were looking for other than to harass us. We were herded into the small kitchen and then one by one, ordered to stand against the wall and hold our driver's license under our chin, while a stern faced agent snapped our photo.
Perhaps to this day, my mug shot is in some "I sell sex" cabinet in the basement of the Federal Building.
After the photo shoot, most of the employees were told to go home. The rest of us (the lucky ones, who then received Combat Pay) were told to gather whatever information the agents wanted. They followed us around as if we were criminals, from the warehouse, to the files, to the edit bays, and even to the bathroom.
I don't think this would have happened if I had worked for a company that made blood and gore movies.
As a child of the sixties, I'd rather make love than war.
And I'd rather find a picture of a naked man in my daughter's pocket than a bullet.
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Comments (33)
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Report Thu Sep 6, 2012 - 1:05 amSo the agents followed you everywhere, including (this is important) the bathroom... because you were peddling perversion. The combination of hypocrisy and chutzpah there is truly breathtaking! I agree with your post 100%, by the way. A well-placed swearword, like a condiment, can add flavor to communication-- but that's one naughty word too many for some. Yet you can't seem to get away from violence-- in the examples you mentioned, in the news, in daily life-- and many of those doing the loudest hollering about dropping F-bombs don't seem to mind that so much.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Fri Sep 7, 2012 at 7:20 am
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Report Mon Sep 3, 2012 - 1:52 amgreat blogReply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Mon Sep 3, 2012 at 3:31 am
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Report Sat Sep 1, 2012 - 10:17 pmIt's fascinating to me, Janie, how things have changed over time with the changes in media, too. Now it's not hard to find sex, violence or both in films or TV or online. My viewing tastes? I prefer moderation. And Kathy's right. How can you protect children these days?Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Sat Sep 1, 2012 at 11:07 pm
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Report Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 5:26 amI'm going to ask the question why do we HAVE to have either? (sex or violence.) I'm no prude, and I'm certainly no stranger to violence. Yet, both subjects are everywhere - often being marketed to our young people. It used to be (in the 50's and 60's) a parent was able to shield their children from sex and violence, but with the technology today, and the sense that anything goes, it's an impossible task.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Fri Aug 31, 2012 at 9:19 am
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Report Fri Aug 31, 2012 - 12:02 amI read that Laurell Hamilton, who writes paranormal erotic books, has said that when she is in Europe doing signings, they complain that she puts too much violence into her books. When she is in the US, they complain that she puts too much sex into her books. Guess that shows how we differ. I used to tease my own kids, when the boys would eagerly devour endless scenes of violence and gore, then turn their heads, cover their eyes and go "yuck!" when the hero finally kissed the girl he had spent the movie pursuing and saving. I told them that the military uses games and movies like that to de-humanize soldiers so that they don't think of the enemy as human...instead, just "the enemy" that should be killed. Not someone's mother/father/son/daughter/husband/wife. Just a thing, not a person. Seriously warped, in my opinion.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Fri Aug 31, 2012 at 9:17 am
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Report Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 8:01 pmI've worked in porn, too, mostly behind the scenes, though I admit to being an extra, here and there. People don't realize how very BORING a porn shoot actually is. I agree with you on the taboo-ness. Take The Hunger Games - a little kissing, a lot of teens murdering teens. PG-13. And when it comes to slasher flicks - isn't it always the girls who are "bad" because they're having sex who get murdered first? Would love to see a society where murder was the biggest taboo, not consensual sex.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Fri Aug 31, 2012 at 3:43 am
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Report Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 12:07 pmI live in France so I can enjoy sex without guilt or violance. Like the other day when my grocery cart brushed a man's behind in the super market (accidentally, of course.) I immediately begged his pardon to which he replied "The pleasure was all mine, Madame." Now that's what I call Classy! The french also know how to eat properly. Anne Crowder www.livingfrenchiseasy.wordpress.comReply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Thu Aug 30, 2012 at 4:25 pm
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Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 3:12 pm
Hey Janie, Nailed it on that last sentence. Loved it.Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Thu Aug 30, 2012 at 4:25 pm
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Report Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 12:02 pmWow, what a sordid life you've led! LOL Although, I honestly would have to disagree that sex is somehow under the covers in the U.S. Have you listened to popular music lately? "Blow my whistle, baby, whistle, baby, come real close." Or watched reality TV, such as Bachelor Pad? Sex, yep, lots of it, and some of it on camera in grainy video. And I'm not sure it's such a great idea to have it all out there. I prefer the subtlety of Sinatra crooning about holding hands...And I'm not sure the FBI is interested in porn for porn's sake these days - it's more about the drugs and the mob connection that go along with the industry. OK, just feeling contrary tonight!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Thu Aug 30, 2012 at 4:24 pm
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Report Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 3:29 amSo true and so sad. What is the solution? It has taken decades of erotic romance's presence with brown paper wrappers to hide the covers before shades Of Gray has finally broken through to WalMart and Target. Such a shame for the truly well written and plotted erotic romancesReply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Thu Aug 30, 2012 at 7:01 am
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Report Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 1:43 amWow, Janie!!! Your family is so lucky to have you!!! I have to rip the sex scenes out of my manuscripts before I can give them to my mother and mother in law. Well, I take that back. My mom once read a love scene I wrote and said, "I can tell you've been reading other books to get inspiration." She just couldn't fathom that I'd taken inspiration from my real life activities. My poor husband looked like I'd given him a million dollars the first time I told him I couldn't care less if he watched porn. Why do we all have to act like sex doesn't exist while at the same time buying our kids first-person shooter games.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Thu Aug 30, 2012 at 7:00 am
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Report Thu Aug 30, 2012 - 1:05 amHear Ye ! Hear Ye! You hit that nail on the head, Janie. Neither 'hit' nor 'head' are meant as violent or sexual references, just to keep things straight. It also seems to be pretty common practice to confuse the two - which helps to create more than a few problems and misconceptions in society. Our movie-rating system comes to mind as one of many examples, though certainly not the most harmful or dangerous. Thanks for another interesting post. JeriReply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Thu Aug 30, 2012 at 6:57 am
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Report Wed Aug 29, 2012 - 8:38 pm"My on-screen presence would not have helped our balance sheet." Got a laugh out of this line, although the overall blog is hardly funny. Violence in films and TV is often used simply to make the story more interesting...when in doubt, set off an explosion or send a car reeling over a bridge, right? Wrong!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Thu Aug 30, 2012 at 6:56 am
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Report Wed Aug 29, 2012 - 7:55 pmI agree with you, Janie. But really? You have led an interesting life. What a story! Killer Joe was crazy. I mean, CRAZY.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Wed Aug 29, 2012 at 8:57 pm
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Report Wed Aug 29, 2012 - 7:53 pmJanie- I couldn't agree more! The only thing that sickens me more than all of the violence surrounding our kids is the way women are portrayed in the media as bitchy, dumb, gold-diggers who care only about their looks. We teach society from a very young age that the size of a woman's boobs equate their value, and that being easy on the eyes is what's important. Having said that, I'd rather our youth see movies and TV programming that show nudity and use lots of four-letter words than those that glorify and normalize violence. Instead of being shocked and disturbed by the prevalence of gun fights, bar fights and cat fights, we accept them as entertainment. Very sad.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Wed Aug 29, 2012 at 8:56 pm
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Report Wed Aug 29, 2012 - 6:20 pmJanie, it's indicative of our repressed sexuality here in the United States. Better still, it's our lack of awareness of a healthy sexuality. The aggression and violence thing is easy, we have that down nicely. But with a culture whose understanding of sexuality is basically on a High School level, this is the outcome. That's why European media and film blends expressions of sexuality in seamlessly while our presentations come off like an awkward grab at a breast in the drive in.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Janie Emaus on Wed Aug 29, 2012 at 8:55 pm
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