Til death do us part... or better off alone?
But life doesn't always work the way we want it to. And when the bad days start to outnumber the good ones, when we just can't take one more slap to our ego, one more sleepless night wondering if our husband is going to come home drunk, one more lipstick stain on his white shirt, well, then that promise must be broken.
At first, we may try marriage counseling and in some cases, this does work. In others it doesn't. The marriage is just not fixable. In that case, it's time to say "I'm outta here," pack our bags and head for the big D.
And while Divorce isn't something we anticipated, it's not a horrible end-all situation. We are simply saying this union isn't working. I'm taking "me" back, and that is a huge step.
It can often be easier to sit back and let the marriage devour you. Let the bad eat you up until one day you're sixty and you look in the mirror and say WTF. What have I done with my life?
I've known too many women who have waited too long, settling for too little. And I have also known women who have stepped through the D exit and made a better life for themselves.
Because Divorce is not the end. It's actually a new beginning.
Sure, it won't be all sunshine and roses. That couple you hung out with every Saturday night may join forces with your husband and think of you as the evil ex. You may lose a friend who you thought would be there for you forever. But then was she really a friend?
If you didn't have to work, you may now have to get a job to provide for you and your children.
You may have many, many battles in court over property, money, custody. And face days when you wonder why you left in the first place. It wasn't really that bad, was it? So what if your marriage wasn't an equal partnership? So what if you weren't very happy?
So what? You only have one life to live. And you better make the best of it. You may have broken a sacred vow but in the end you still have yourself.
And isn't that what's most important?