Dec 22

Christmas cream-crackered

Comments (2) by marketingtomilk December 22, 2011 - 7:01 AM

Why is Christmas such a lot of effort these days? It used to be about just turning up, porking up and remembering to let out your elasticated waistband.  A free lunch - and what a lunch at that. I don't think I saw the inside of a kitchen on Christmas day until I was 20, and then it was only because I was old enough to control my own refills.

As if it's not enough to have to think of and buy and wrap all those presents and come up with 45 variations on the standard Christmas message, my five year old is now gifting his own cards. As if I have the time to sit down and sound out h-a-p-p-y c-h-r-i-s-t-m-a-s with him 23 times, with all the shopping and decorating and festive drinking I have left to do.

At least with the Christmas fancy dress thing, I've had it pretty lucky so far. The shepherd costume my mother made two years ago is still going strong, albeit the tea towel had to be updated this year as it had started smelling of damp dog.  And I have had to start badmouthing Joseph just in case my eldest gets a bit ambitious next year when they start to break away from the standard shepherd chorus and give out actual speaking parts.

And how an earth do people have time to bake Christmas pudding months in advance and schedule weekly sessions of spoon feeding it brandy like some kind of alcoholic piranha fish. And the mulling of the wine and the porking of the pies and the blanketing of the sausages?

And the expense and physical demand of sourcing all those hospitality wines you're forced to carry around with you all festive season, but then drink all yourself before Christmas Eve due to the sheer stress of it all.

Actually, I have to admit to some exaggeration, since I've never actually cooked a Christmas dinner myself, and I've certainly never even attempted to mull a wine or stuff a turkey's backside.

But with a move into a much bigger house on the horizon, I fear it may be "our turn" next year.

And isn't the mere thought of it all simply exhausting?

by marketingtomilk December 22, 2011 - 7:01 AM


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Comments (2)

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  • Report Thu Dec 22, 2011 - 11:15 pm
    This year for the first time I've had enough of Christmas cards, that stressed me out this year as I simply couldn't be arsed. Plus Lois had the first term at school thing so that meant more cards and a present for the teacher? Who knew. I too no nothing of stuffing, turkey or gravy - I hand it all over to my husband who is apoplectic with excitement at this time of year. My job is to make a Bailey's Tiramisu for pud and scoff all the food appreciatively which suits me just dandy.
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  • Report Thu Dec 22, 2011 - 3:23 pm
    We have no sense of womanly duty - we now ask why us? This is fair enough - I say!!
    Reply Delete

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