Jun 14

I quit!

Comments (35) by Sandra C June 14, 2012 - 6:01 AM

I love blogging.

Blogging, or rather the topics that I'm going to blog about, are quite literally constantly bouncing around in my head, as I mentally write and rewrite posts based on what I see, hear, and feel in my immediate or not so immediate surroundings.

Blogging has made me more in tune with my environment. I listen to conversations more intently. I study people's faces thoroughly. I eavesdrop like nobody's business. Most of what I think I will blog about never even makes it to a rough draft. But when I do blog, my rule is that I will never blog about something that I wouldn't say out loud.

And yet, when one of my teenagers told me that people at his school were approaching him, and saying that they were reading his mother's blog, my heart cartwheeled in my chest. In that instant, I realized that maybe I was also writing about things I wouldn't say out loud. Maybe in my blogging, I was taking my thoughts one step further; putting a spin on an otherwise boring conversation; throwing in words that are shocking and funny, and certainly not meant for adolescents.

In that instant I was ashamed of myself. Did I really want my children's teachers reading about my vagina? Would their friends make references about their mother's blog...or vagina? How embarrassing would it be for them to be walking down the hall, and have some stupid-ass teenager call out something as inappropriate about me, or about them, as I write in a post?

Immediately I deleted two years worth of posts on my personal blog. I wrote my editor here In the Powder Room and with a very heavy heart, I resigned my writing spot. I deactivated my Twitter account. I disabled the Facebook "Like" box on my personal blog.

I was done. That was it. I love and respect my children too much to be that "crazy" mother that we all remember from when we were teenagers; that mother who showed up at the school wearing two different shoes, carrying a crumpled, brown paper bag that she handed to her humiliated child.

I may not be walking through their hallways in mismatched shoes. But the written word can paint a far more vivid picture. I don't want that for my kids.

However, less than a week into my blogging retirement, my children came to me, and said something I'll never forget: "Mom, you shouldn't quit blogging. It's who you are."

It's who I am... Wow...

My kids are awesome.

They love me even though I am that crazy lady with the mismatched shoes.

by Sandra C June 14, 2012 - 6:01 AM

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Comments (35)

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  • Report Mon Jun 25, 2012 - 7:13 am
    by  Laurie
    If I learned anything from this, it is to keep up with my reading before you delete everything again and I am lost. Ok, so most of them are still in my emails, but the powder room ones I cannot access. I also admire your relationship with your children, you are open to their suggestions and keep their feelings in mind. And when I read the porn mom's comment about "things I didn't realize were affecting her", it made me realize that the fact that your kids are comfortable enough to even tell you to keep blogging is a big deal. Kids do have a hard time expressing themselves to their parents, but I see by your openness, you have made yourself more available to them.
    Reply Delete
  • 2 replies, Last reply by Sandra on Mon Jun 25, 2012 at 8:13 am
  • Report Mon Jun 25, 2012 - 7:17 am
    by  Laurie
    @Laurie: and yes, I realized I scrolled down to quote her comment exactly and I could have just as easily scrolled down to type in her name, so to Janie, I apologize for my lack of decency....I said porn mom, not in a derogatory way...(never would, I love the stuff...so many vaginas...and happy penises), but in a reference type way so people would know which post I referred to without having to scroll down to read the comments again.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Mon Jun 25, 2012 - 8:13 am
    by  Sandra
    @Laurie: And I'm sure Janie is ok with your apology. Plus if you like the vaginas and happy penises, we love you! Thanks for taking the time to comment Laurie, I saw in my inbox that you've been catching up on your In the Powder Room reading! We love that too! :)
    Reply Delete
  • Report Sat Jun 23, 2012 - 3:27 am
    Sounds like you've got some great kids. Now turn that laptop back on, girl, because vaginas are awesome. Like, half of everyone I know has one!
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Sat Jun 23, 2012 at 5:26 am
  • Report Sat Jun 23, 2012 - 5:26 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Kim at Let Me Start By Saying: I do love 'vagina' talk. I miss it. Then again, my vagina's been too tired to make any appearances lately, so it does create a bit of a blogging drought.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 9:53 am
    by  Felicia
    I am so glad you didn't quit. I can just imagine how scary it was to find out your teenagers friends where reading what you wrote. But you dear have the coolest kids on the planet! I love how they love you enough to let you be you, even if you do talk about vaginas a lot. (which by the way is totally cool)
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:11 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:11 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Felicia: I know right, vaginas are cool...especially if you're an adolescent boy...I'm guessing...
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 10:08 am
    by  Robin
    Simply said. "BRAVO". For you and your kids!!!! Well done!!!! I am considerably older than you BUT I am finally discovering me!!!!! Bravo!! For discovering you now! Your kids are AWESOME!!! You've obviously dome something right!!!!!
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:10 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:10 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Robin: I think I've discovered me because of my kids. I think giving of yourself to others all the time forces one to really evaluate. Thank you for your kind comment!
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 10:25 am
    by  Sue
    Your children are as fabulous in their collective wisdom as you are in your ability to command an audience through your writing. So keep fighting the good fight. But I love that you are mindful of them. Their feelings. Their concerns.. Their teenager-ness. You *can* walk the line on this issue. Truthful writer and kick-ass mom are not mutually exclusive. xoxo
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:07 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:07 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Sue: Thanks Sue! I'm glad they were all in agreement. And now they got their allowance back...kidding! I'm kidding!
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 11:10 am
    I'm So glad you didn't quit. But I will tell you that I worked in the Porn business for 10 years while my kids were in elementary through high school and my daughter does have some stories about things she wasn't happy about. Things I didn't realize were affecting her. It's good to see that you're listening to what you're kids are saying. It's a fine line. But not one that can't be walked.
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:06 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:06 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Janie Emaus: It's a toughy though. Do we give up our hobbie, or in your case, your employment for our children? You're right it is a fine line. And now i have to go read every post you've ever written: porn? Really? ~she said excitedly~
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 12:01 pm
    by  Jam
    As you know I think your blog rocks and I am glad you are haning around as you would be missed your posts are not crude, rude or in anyway bad.........in my opinion.................
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:04 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:04 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Jam: Thank you! Thank you! And I think your opinion is a very good one.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 3:15 pm
    I would say the kiddos don't fall far from the tree. They're AWESOME and so are YOU! You've got the stamp of approval from your kids. You need nothing more. I am so proud for you to have such wonderful little spirits in your home. :) They deserve a party!!! :D
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:04 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:04 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Magical Mystical Mimi: Thank you, but no, no party...unless I get to blog about the teens making out and shit. Otherwise what's the point?
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 3:22 pm
    by  lori dyan
    There are far worse things to be addicted to...like monkey porn...
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:01 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:01 am
    by  Sandra C
    @lori dyan: Monkey porn...see, I bet that would be neat.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 9:10 pm
    by  mary i
    Great post, honest and real. What is wrong with mismatched shoes anyway?? ( i do anything to make people go Hmmm? .) :)
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 22, 2012 at 8:01 am
  • Report Fri Jun 22, 2012 - 8:01 am
    by  Sandra C
    @mary i: I've done the mismatched shoes thing, but I wasn't walking into the school. I was running through the grocery store. Doesn't count.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Thu Jun 14, 2012 - 8:15 pm
    Have you picked out which two different shoes you'll be wearing? Blogging is a moody wench. Too personal? Not personal enough? Have I outgrown this blog and need a sparkly new one? We're all supporting you through this struggle you're going through right now. Have a great summer!
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 15, 2012 at 8:06 am
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 8:06 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Julie's Rants: Thank you, and yes, you sure called it: blogging is a moody wench. I would like a sparkly new one, but I'm busy spending all my money on mismatched shoes.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Thu Jun 14, 2012 - 8:17 pm
    Your kids are awesome and so are you. I'm tearing up over here because of how thoughtful your kids are. It's who they are.
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 15, 2012 at 8:06 am
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 8:06 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Unknown Mami: I know, right, it really was a heartfelt moment, which made pushing out four 8 pounders all the more worth it.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Thu Jun 14, 2012 - 9:35 pm
    I think the crazy mom's were always the fun mom's. Plus, I like that you are constantly talking about a vaginas. There is something so freeing about that, I believe. I introduced your blog to some co-workers and we would laugh and laugh. You need not quit blogging (or entertaining us for that matter). We need your spin on life for a reality check! You're kids are as awesome as you are!
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 15, 2012 at 8:05 am
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 8:05 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Laurie of Lulu and Daisy: OMG I love it that you introduced my blog to your co-workers! The vaginas reading, the better!
    Reply Delete
  • Report Thu Jun 14, 2012 - 11:17 pm
    Phew - we were all worried and there was an empty space in our world. Glad you are sticking with it!! Hurrah!
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 15, 2012 at 8:04 am
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 8:04 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Clare Macnaughton: Awww, thanks so much Clare, what a nice thing to say. I missed you guys for those 4 days I left.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 4:01 am
    by  Joanne
    You are doing the right thing, and am so glad you are not quitting. I hope you transfered your posts so that you can look back on them. I would hate to think that they are gone forever. Blessings, Joanne
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 15, 2012 at 8:04 am
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 8:04 am
    by  Sandra C
    @Joanne: Sadly Joanne, they're gone forever. I tend to do things hastily, then regret my decisions. I learn the hard way, I guess...
    Reply Delete
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 4:18 am
    I can't tell you how happy I am that you're back In The Powder Room!!! Your kids are freakin' awesome. Those apples did NOT fall far from the vagina!
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Fri Jun 15, 2012 at 8:03 am
  • Report Fri Jun 15, 2012 - 8:03 am
    by  Sandra C
    @ChiTown Girl: No, YOU'RE AWESOME! I'm so glad you're so glad I'm back here. And I'm so glad my editors are AWESOME! And I'm so glad you said 'vagina' because really, it's my favourite word.
    Reply Delete
  • Report Thu Jun 14, 2012 - 7:27 pm
    You've got some pretty cool kids there! I can totally understand and the first time I was confronted about something I said on my blog, I did that heart-stomach-cartwheel thing... and I'm meant to be somewhat anonymous. FECK. Luckily, I don't have to make any decisions surrounding how it affects my children at school for a quite some time, but I'm sure that day will come.
    Reply Delete
  • 1 reply, Last reply by Sandra C on Thu Jun 14, 2012 at 7:39 pm
  • Report Thu Jun 14, 2012 - 7:39 pm
    by  Sandra C
    @Lady Estrogen: Thanks E....it's been a bumpy ride. Just last week I deleted everything I had written since the last tme I had deleted because my husband had a melt down. And yet, I can't stop blogging...I think I may need a detox.
    Reply Delete

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