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Wait, I'm HOW old?!
I recently spent a Friday evening in Colonial Williamsburg attending the launch party for an anthology of short stories to which I contributed. Williamsburg is the home of the College of William & Mary, and as I headed back to my hotel following the soiree, I noticed packs of college kids roaming the streets in search of festivity and libations.
Seeing this, I felt a familiar pang of nostalgia. Where were the good parties tonight? I wondered. What were the best bars around here? And which fraternities had the cutest boys?
But then I remembered that it was 10 p.m. and I was tired. And that an entire night of blessed solitude awaited me back at my hotel room, away from my husband and toddler. And that I had a husband and toddler.
I considered the fact that I can no longer down more than two drinks on any given night without suffering a hangover for the next two days; and how going to bed past midnight will invariably throw off my sleep cycle for a week.
I thought about how my knees creak nowadays whenever I crouch down or climb stairs; and the way my right one often hurts in advance of low-pressure systems, like an old man who can predict the weather based solely on his aching joints. Gonna be a big one, Maude - I can feel it!
And with a sudden start, I realized that 1997 was not just "a few years ago," that my college years were in the distant past, and that at almost 38 years old, I was the same age my parents were when they used to spend Friday nights at home watching Dallas.
Admittedly, this was all a bit disconcerting. In my mind, I was clearly still 22.
But then I thought back to another night a few months earlier when I'd gone bar hopping with some girlfriends in the college town of Blacksburg following a Virginia Tech football game. I had donned skinny jeans and a sparkly black top and headed out for a sexy, exciting, self-validating night on the town. I'd looked good -- and years younger than my actual age. And yet the experience was neither sexy nor exciting nor particularly self-validating.
Maybe it was the wedding ring, or my crow's feet, or the fact that I lacked swagger in my three-inch heels. Regardless, the cute frat boys didn't spare me a passing glance... which was fine since I did, after all, have a family waiting for me at home. In fact, I'd been rather bored that night as I stood around nursing my two beers and a club soda while observing the various mating rituals of the single and horny.
And then it hit me: My college years are in the distant past. You couldn't pay me to relive my twenties. I like spending quiet nights at home. I am right where I'm supposed to be.
So, why does it always shock the hell out of me whenever I realize exactly how old I am?
Kristin Alexander is a writer,
blogger, and self-proclaimed city girl now living a decidedly more rural life
in eastern West Virginia - or as she likes to spin it, the far western suburbs
of D.C. The working mom of a sassy "threenager," her blog What She
Said offers up an irreverent blend of family, life, and humor - because if she
didn't laugh, she'd cry. Talk to her on Twitter (@SaidKristin) or Facebook, where she's made
it her life's mission to outsmart Mark Zuckerberg and his mysterious EdgeRank
algorithm.
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Comments (23)
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Report Mon Mar 11, 2013 - 1:11 amWhile I get nostalgic sometimes for what were my twenties, I am recently so glad I never have to be 23 again. The stupid, the squealing, the husband-hunting. It was a blast at the time, but there is a well-earned sense of confidence and resolve to almost-40 I am starting to enjoy... and my gosh did I really have that much energy 15 years ago?Reply -
Report Mon Mar 4, 2013 - 9:58 pmI know! I keep wondering when I'm going to feel like a grown up. My sensible shoes, early bed times, and distinct lack of take out food past midnight seem to indicate I am, in fact old.Reply
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Report Sat Mar 2, 2013 - 9:36 amI totally get this! I'm turning 40 this year but I feel like I should be turning 23...until I look in the mirror and make all of my many "annual" doctor and scanning appointments that come with this age. I guess we're actually living the good life, if you think about it. Our hearts and minds feel young and we are happy with where our nights take place most nights...at home with our families!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 9:44 pm
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Sat Mar 2, 2013 - 4:47 am
I know the feeling. I'm 22 and I have a child who's 25. I still haven't worked that one out.Reply -
2 replies, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 9:01 am
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Report Sat Mar 2, 2013 - 4:02 amOh, I'm sure the frat boys were checking you out - but they were afraid to talk to the hot cougar. Wait til you hit 40 - it is AWESOME!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 8:59 am
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Report Sat Mar 2, 2013 - 2:28 amHa! I'm aware of this all the time. I'm so far beyond wanting to go out and drink or, heck, stand around in heels. Give me good TV and a cup of tea any night. It's all downhill from here, isn't it? ;)Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 3:03 am
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Report Sat Mar 2, 2013 - 1:34 amHappy birthday! I always feel the same nostalgia when I'm near campus. But yeah, I'd rather be home in bed than out on the town any night.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 3:01 am
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Report Fri Mar 1, 2013 - 11:12 pmI so get this. In my head I'm still in my mid-20s. Something will happen to remind me that I really am over 40 and all I can think is, "how did this happen? where did the time go? does this mean I'm grown up?"Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 3:00 am
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Report Fri Mar 1, 2013 - 10:15 pmI have this happy pretty much every time I got out to a place like that now. But I do have to smile and enjoy the fact that I am no longer in that part of my life! And keep on rockin' those skinny jeans! ;) Happy Birthday to you!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 2:58 am
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Fri Mar 1, 2013 - 10:05 pm
Happy birthday! It amazes me how I simultaneously cringe at and miss the nonsense that is dating. My husband and I remark that if our marriage is ever on the rocks, no matter how bad it gets, we'll stick around. Because ain't nobody got time to be teaching a new person about how I like my potatoes.Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Sat Mar 2, 2013 at 2:57 am
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Fri Mar 1, 2013 - 6:08 pm
Hey Kristin, Great Post! - Wait till you get to your forties and fifties - They rock - They really do - and so will you.Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Fri Mar 1, 2013 at 8:29 pm
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Fri Mar 1, 2013 - 5:32 pm
Happy Birthday, Kristin! Recently, someone said, oh gosh, I'm 30, so old! My mature response was of course, meh. 37/ 38 is the new 22 anyway. Have a great birthday!Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by SaidKristin on Fri Mar 1, 2013 at 8:26 pm
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