The world revolves around boobs
Dear Regular Guy,
What is the fascination men have for my boobs? Why are they the first, and sometimes only, thing they look at?
Dear Miss Fontaine,
Very difficult question to answer without knowing specifically what the trouble is, any chance you could send in a photo so I can have a really good think about it?
I have absolutely no idea how old I was when I first became obsessed with those wonderful orbs of fun you ladies carry about with you. As far as I'm concerned, I've always been able to talk, always been able to walk, and always hoped to catch a glimpse of breast.
You might as well ask me why I like watching those "send in your own video clips" style shows where drunken Grannies fall over at weddings or toddlers get knocked over by over-zealous dads trying to ride their children's scooters. No one really knows why these shows are so popular, they just are. Somehow, deep in our psyche we really like seeing fat men slipping while attempting a dive at a swimming pool and belly-flopping into the water. Likewise, men just can't stop watching tits.
Long before I knew what sex was, I would be distracted looking down my teacher's top for just a fleeting glimpse of bra. It wasn't, to my knowledge, sexual at all, just a sheer uncontrollable urge or unquenchable thirst. A thirst. Is it really that simple? Could it really be a deep-seated instinct to feed? Surely not? I do know that I absolutely couldn't stop looking, even though it was long before I knew what I might do if I ever got hold of them.
I just wanted to innocently bury my head into them. That's all.
Over the years, I've discovered all sorts of fun things you can do with boobs but still, on the whole, I'd say that I'm at my happiest with my head buried so maybe there's some truth in the feeding theory. No?
However, I long since grew out my childish inability to control myself. What I never understand is why men, being supposedly adults, arrogantly think it's okay to blatantly stare at your chest so overtly that it causes discomfort. How can they not know that it's just plain rude? Not to mention very slightly aggressive.
I'm not perfect; I'm going to pretend that I am. I occasionally have a sneaky chest-glance of every woman I ever meet. I'm not trying to justify this or defend myself, it's wrong and I know that it is. But I think that we all occasionally do this. Women do it too, albeit by looking at different things, nonetheless we all check each other's bits out at some point. But the thing is, that's all it should be and nothing more. You can't just stand there staring and think that this is okay. It's not okay. It's never okay.