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My first Mardi Gras
I was 18 years old and dumber than a box of hammers when I drove from Pittsburgh to New Orleans for Mardi Gras with three of my boyfriend's fraternity brothers in my Grandpa's 1977 GMC Jimmy.
Oh yes. I did.
"Laissez les bons temps rouler!"
Hey, seemed like a good idea at the time.
My boyfriend couldn't go with us, but he assured me these guys would take good care of me. And they did; perfect gentlemen and excellent bodyguards, every one of them.
Of course it took us a lot longer to get there than we had anticipated, what with our front axel snapping in two somewhere outside of Tuscaloosa, Alabama. Not sure how we lived through that one, actually. We were going about 70 MPH when it happened.
It was the waiting for car parts at that little service station and playing cards all day with those three guys that brings back some of my best memories from that road trip. Lord almighty, the conversations we had that day over cold Cokes and fresh peanuts about school, girls, and life in general.
Derek was actually from New Orleans and his mother still lived there, right smack in the middle of the French Quarter in a restored bordello that still had the original 8 feet tall stained glass windows and a central courtyard that I couldn't walk through without shouting "STELLA" and making a scene....every. damn. time.
I could have stayed there forever.
Derek's mom was a divorcee and an incredibly talented interior designer. She had a group of gay male friends she called her "sisters" and when they all got together it was like a scene from The Bird Cage.
She welcomed the four of us road-weary travelers with hugs, Muffaletta sandwiches, and real King Cake. Afterwards, she pinned her business card inside each of our jackets with the note "If lost, please return me to:" scrawled across the top, above her name.
Then she sent us out as a pack to explore and discover things like 32 oz. Hurricanes and the commerce of boobs for plastic beads.
Thank God that was years before the Girls Gone Wild franchise, because I definitely earned my fair share of plastic jewelry that night. I also received a $20 bill from one sweet gentleman who was all out of beads but felt compelled to acknowledge my "talents." Hey, if I knew then what I know now, I would have just walked those streets topless.
So here we are, Mardi Gras, 24 years later, and I think back fondly to the days when my biggest responsibility was finding our way back to that beautiful bordello. I don't know if the 41 year old Iris would ever willingly go on an adventure like that, but I'm sure glad the 18 year old Iris did. Bless her firm, carefree heart!
Let's just hope my daughter never asks me for permission to do the same thing.
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Comments (37)
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Report Sun Feb 26, 2012 - 5:36 amLoved this post! Ah for the good ol' days. But the extra bonus laugh came in one of your comment replies. I loved the instructions for the technique for flashing your boobs. Entertaining and educational. Shirt over the face. Got it! EllenReply -
Report Wed Feb 22, 2012 - 6:40 pmWould you believe I never flashed ANYONE?!?!? How can I die knowing I didn't really LIVE? If only I could turn back time.Reply
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2 replies, Last reply by Jen Has A Pen on Fri Feb 24, 2012 at 1:26 am
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Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 7:41 pm
Laissez les bons temps rouler!!!!! Hell Yeah. Throw me some beads mister! Broke down in Tuscaloosa - that is one stinkin town (no offense Tuscaloosa residents, but you know it is true, something about papermills or some such), but it does sound like you had a fine old time at the gas station. I "might" know Derek's mom. I have a fine collection of beads myself, no memory of how I got them, but I was missing my bra (among other things) the next day. New Orleans is wonderful, but not for the faint of heart, during Mardi Gras. I don't go anymore. It is much nicer to visit after the crowds leave. Also, if you see someone with ashes on their forehead tomorrow, please don't wipe them off. You drove all the way from Pittsburg, dammit girl. More impressed with you than usual. Thanks for the walk down Bourbon street! If we all flash our tits will you throw us some beads?Reply -
6 replies, Last reply by Gigi (Ed.) on Thu Feb 23, 2012 at 8:26 pm
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Report Thu Feb 23, 2012 - 4:06 amYou're never too old to go back. Trust me!Reply
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2 replies, Last reply by father muskrat on Thu Feb 23, 2012 at 8:26 pm
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Thu Feb 23, 2012 - 2:22 pm
I love the fact that you loved your road trip but your daughter is never allowed to live the life you led. I am the same. My kids are going to live in a cage under the stars until they are 30.Reply -
Report Thu Feb 23, 2012 - 2:31 amI think my favorite part is when she pinned her card to you so you could be returned WHEN you got lost in the haze of booze and boobs that is Mardi Gras...lolReply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Thu Feb 23, 2012 at 11:55 am
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Wed Feb 22, 2012 - 2:52 am
I've never been to Mardi Gras, but your story brought back memories, nonetheless.Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Feb 22, 2012 at 12:04 pm
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Report Wed Feb 22, 2012 - 2:09 amI went to New Orleans for a conference in grad school with a bunch of girlfriends. I seriously wonder how we all made it home in one piece! The 3-4-1 drinks were beckoning us from every bar front. I did see Nicholas Cage wandering down Bourbon St. with some bodyguards. I, in my hurricane-induced stupor, followed him into a bar, and put my arm behind his body guard's back to rub his leather jacket clad shoulder. Then I looked up and noticed I was in the Hustler! Oh, and Nicholas Cage was, and still is, GROSS!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Feb 22, 2012 at 11:59 am
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 8:19 pmI could not love this post more. Brings back memories of college and road trips and my one visit to the Big Easy for the 1995 Sugar Bowl. :)Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 11:31 pm
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 8:54 pmI like to think of those years as part of the "lost years" ! ROFL.....your post brought back memories. And there is NO WAY my twin girls are even getting close to unchaperoned. Thanks for the great post!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 11:30 pm
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 9:02 pmFunniest damn thing I have read in ages and after gravity and yesterday's mammogram, NOBODY would EVER want me to flash my girls. But I sure remember those drinks!!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 11:29 pm
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 6:02 pmI think the same thing about my daughter when I remember my senior year in high school spring break trip from IN to Panama City Beach, FL. NEVER will she go that young unchaperoned.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 7:45 pm
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 6:12 pmThe hubby and I spent three weeks in New Orleans just prior to Mardi Gras pre-Katrina as we were travelling around in the trailer. What a beautiful city, what great food! It is a place that should be seen and experienced although I wonder if it is the same.... Those parades, even before the big day, are something to see. And no, I was too old at the time to "acquire plastic jewelry."Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 7:45 pm
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 6:31 pmI was listening to the Dennis Miller show over the weekend and there was a discussion about an apparent entity that a few people have where you can recall every day of your life, all conversations, etc. All I can say is there is a reason we forget things.....omgosh.....the shame.....love your story. I never did anything like that, but enough I would like to forget. Love you Iris! PS People who were a bit wild while young really make the best parents for today's kids! The naivete of some of the other parents when raising my girls was almost laughable.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 7:44 pm
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 7:24 pmI have many fond New Orleans memories that are all a bit fuzzy but include amazing food, overly sweet drinks, and partying with a group of transvestites who were all far more attractive than I was. I actually hate that our kids run the risk of having every "risque moment" of their lives possibly recorded and posted online for all eternity, squashing future job prospects, etc. Everybody deserves their own Girls Gone Wild moment. As long as it IS only a moment ;)Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 7:43 pm
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Report Tue Feb 21, 2012 - 5:33 pmI put going to Mardi Gras on my bucket list. I am forty now and a little intimidated by the very thought of it, but will make the trip one day.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Feb 21, 2012 at 5:46 pm
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